I almost never give advice on whether people should have children, but when it comes to saying having which was more difficult for me, I don’t hesitate. Having my second child was a lot more overwhelming, because suddenly I had no downtime and not enough hands. When my second child napped, my first was awake. When my older son who was learning to ride a tricycle took off toward the street, I had to decide whether to chase after him with a baby in my arms or leave my baby alone in the yard. And so I wondered, which kid is harder on parents’ immediate happiness? Is there data that could help answer the question?

It goes without saying, and the author makes it clear too, that this isn’t hard data. And she also points out that this only refers to the first couple of years of the child’s life. But still—something to think about, especially if you’re a proactive kind of couple.

Joe Stracci